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Soon after Brittlynn was born Kye started having potty issues. Honestly, Zach and I both thought it was for attention and that he was doing the typical regression thing we’d heard about when children welcome in a new sibling. Kye has been using the potty since he was 18 months old. He’s been completely potty trained, night and day, since around two years old. In January he started going to the bathroom more frequently and started having occasional accidents. We dealt with it the best we could, we didn’t punish him. We took him to the potty whenever he asked to go (including the MANY times at naps and night) and just changed his clothes whenever an accident occurred.
It seemed to get more and more frequent and I began to notice that he wasn’t only doing it at times where he might be wanting attention. We were watching a movie and he got up and went potty, on his own, four times in less than an hour. That doesn’t make sense. My first thought was UTI. Zach took him to the dr and although he tested negative for a UTI, his symptoms fit so they treated him for one.
He went through 10 days on antibiotics and it seemed to get a little better, but not really. Since then it has only continued. He will go potty then turn around and have to go potty again. It’s like he doesn’t fully empty his bladder. He’ll sit for a long time and still have to go again. He’ll have little accidents like a little squirt in his underwear, not even soaking through to the pants. I asked school and they said he does ask to go potty more often than he used to. It’s affecting his nights and naps as he now typically wakes up at least once in the night yelling out that he has to go potty. He will go at least three times before settling down for his nap and will often wake up during the nap and have to go. We couldn’t help but think it was a behavior issue. We even made him wear pull-ups one night (poor kid was SO upset) because we were at a loss of how else to handle it. We thought if we put him back in diapers that he might realize he couldn’t keep getting up to go potty over and over for attention (that particular night it was 9:30 and he was still not asleep due to using the potty so often).
It felt like he was doing it to act out, but that is so not a typical Kye way to behave. I decided that I’d ask the dr about it during Britt’s check up. I really hesitated asking. A BIG part of me didn’t want to hear that he was acting out because I didn’t want to have to start punishing him for the behavior. We are already pretty strict on the discipline and I didn’t want the poor kid to start adding up the spankings. After we asked all the questions about Britt, I just casually asked her about Kye. She immediately told me to pull down his pants so she could see it. Right away she said his little tee-tee hole is too small.
I took Kye to the potty to have him give them a sample while Britt got her shots and Kelly said they would refer us to a specialist. She said he may need an out patient procedure to correct the problem. Awesome. We went to the doctor for Brittlynn and left worrying about Kye instead. Not what I had planned!
We went this past Wednesday to the specialist. It’s about a 45 minute drive to Tifton. Zach took off the morning to go with us and Mrs. Charlotte came to the house to watch Brittlynn. After sitting for over an hour and a half waiting to be seen, the doctor pretty much just looked at Kye’s private and said we needed to schedule the surgery. I was thrown off guard. To be honest, I hadn’t done a single bit of research prior to the appointment. I deal with scary stuff by living in denial. I didn’t really want to think about it and it was pretty easy to “forget” about since we had Kye’s big party, birthday, and I got the stomach bug.
I had ZERO questions prepared. My mind totally skipped over something being wrong with him and jumped to the surgery. I asked a bunch of random questions about that. About how long he’d be under, how long it would last, what the healing time would be etc. I never ONCE thought to ask the obvious questions: what caused this? what is it even called? how common is it? is surgery really necessary? what would happen if we didn’t do the surgery?
The doctor didn’t tell us much. He did say that it was a really good find by Kelly and that most people never notice this issue with kids this young but since Kye was fully potty trained so young that’s why we realized it. He also said we need to have a bunch more kids because we’re doing such a good job. Nice to hear, but I wish he would have focused more on telling me what is up with my kids junk than complimenting me and (as Zach later told me) staring at my chest.
We were ushered into another office to schedule the appointment. It all felt like it was happening too fast. They wanted to do it THIS Monday! Um no. I need TIME to process this!!! We scheduled the appointment for Monday morning April 2nd. He is out of school that week so I figured that’d be the best time plus it’s the day after we get back from Casey’s wedding so I won’t feel so bad needing Mrs. Charlotte’s help. Again, we were quickly ushered in to talk about insurance with another lady. She said that our deductible for Kye will be more than met for the year with this surgery…which means it’s going to cost MORE than $5,000 out of our pockets. Are you kidding?!? Literally the doctor told us he will walk in, slice the hole bigger, and walk out. It’s less than a five minute long surgery. He said we’ll go in early that morning and be home by lunch. For that much dough. And we were SO happy to be done with medical bills after Zach’s back…
Kye behaved BEAUTIFULLY at the appointment. We rode through Zaxby’s on the way home and got home in time for his nap. Zach and I didn’t handle the discussion that well. I am a nervous wreck about it. Thinking about Kye being put under freaks me out. The thought of seeing him in a hospital freaks me out. I don’t do well with those types of things and I myself have never experienced anything close to this. Zach was blown away by the money figure and couldn’t really focus much past that. Typical man and woman huh?
Zach called a distant family member who is a surgeon to discuss it with him and he said that he went to school with the guy in Tifton and that if he said he needs it done then he needs it. I have put in two calls now to Dr. Griner’s office. I understand he probably needs it done but I don’t like that I didn’t get to REALLY discuss it with the doctor on a level where I feel fully comfortable doing this. I especially don’t like going back and forth to Tifton. We have a hospital here. One that we are comfortable with, one where Kye has been before (when Britt was born). I would much rather be 10 minutes from home than 45 minutes. It’s silly to me that we have to go up there and I am hoping Dr. Griner’s office can refer us to someone local. That way I can get a second opinion and hopefully have it all done here, if needed.
I’ve done more research the past couple of days and have found out it’s called Meatal Stenosis. It’s actually caused from circumcision. Which is ironic seeing as my father discouraged us having Kye circumcised to begin with! From what I have read it happens when the penis is healing from circumcision and rubs against the diaper and causes scar tissue. It is the narrowing of the opening of the urethra and the symptoms of it are abnormal strength and direction of urine stream, bed wetting, bleeding at end of urination (Kye doesn’t have this thank the Lord!), discomfort with urination (not this either), straining with urination, incontinence, visible narrow opening. It said most boys with this issue have to sit down to urinate because their stream will shoot upwards…which Kye’s does (we haven’t taught him to stand yet anyway though so it hasn’t been an issue). To fix the problem all they will do is cut his tee-tee hole a little bigger. Healing time is a couple of days and there are no stitches or anything.
So far in my research I can’t find anything about the long-term effects of having meatal stenosis or what would happen if it were left untreated. I also can’t find how common it is. Right now we’re keeping the appointment in Tifton and waiting to hear from Dr. Griner’s regarding another referral. We’re praying and being patient, waiting to make the final call when we feel we know what is best for Kye. I’d appreciate your help in those prayers as we make this decision. I’m pretty sure we WILL be having him get the surgery (as it makes sense to do this while he is young rather than wait it out and it be more traumatic for him in some way) but I’m hopeful we can find a way to do it locally and in a situation where we understand everything better.
I will, of course, keep everyone posted as we learn more and as we decide what to do! Thank you for the prayers and if ANY of you have experienced this in any capacity I’d love to hear your story and any advice or insight! Thanks!!!